I Was a Bad Kid

working on a new book

November 30th, 2012

more details to come!
also doing a financial site about bad credit loans
and just launched a running blog running and training for 5Ks

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top download kindle for Amazon

Amazon top downloads

Check it out!

http://www.thebestbadcreditloans.com/

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Let me know if you’d like a copy of the book! I only have a few left in stock

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I was a Bad Kid is now available via Amazon on Kindle here and also for the Nook from Barnes and Noble Here!

If you would like to get the paperback version, you can pay via paypal below (FREE SHIPPING to the US!!!) and it will ship out early June. Just $2.99:) I’m not trying to be a millionaire, just trying to share my book with as many people as possible


Enjoy!

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Checker Chucking – The Finale

December 13th, 2010

It started off as a fun game. It ended up in being grounded over my birthday. You see my friend and I tired of the vcr game itself, so we decided to spice the game up a bit. We build forts with pillows, hid behind them, and just simply chucked them at each other with all our might.
Those things would whiz past our heads and ricochet off of anything close by. It was fun. It was immaturity. It was survival!

All of a sudden, the front door opened. My dad had come home from work early, which he never did, and he was not too happy. He said something hit the front door as he neared it that sounded “like a gunshot” (I’ll always remember that quote).

He saw what we were doing and was very unhappy and had me send my friend home. I thought the worst was over, but oh it wasn’t. You see, my dad worked hard for nearly 40 years and took great pride in our house and its appearance. What I didn’t know, was that those checkers we were chucking across the room had little notches in them, and when those checkers hit a wooden wall, it leaves distinguishable and unpleasant marks on said wall.

The walls in our house were spotted all over with nicks and scratches and my dad about flipped his sh*t over all of that. I hid up in my room till dinner and then was handed my punishment. A grounding of 2 weeks, which happened to fall on my birthday. Sure, I deserved it, I don’t argue that point at all.

I learned the hard way that VCR games are just for VCRs and not a full contact sport. That’s a free tip from me to you.

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Checker Chucking

December 3rd, 2010

I will start this story blaming my parents. I was 12 and I shouldn’t have been able to have a friend over, unsupervised. I had proven time after time how incredibly irresponsible I was, so I plead not guilty to the following story.

My friend and I had grown tired and bored of playing super mario brothers….or maybe it was Tecmo Bowl… anyway, we needed something else to do. So, we dug up one of my VCR games. Anyone remember them? You put in a VHS tape, and watch it, and do certain things on your gameboard according to the video. Anyway, sound boring? It was….

So, we decided to take all the checker chips that come with it, and instead of using them as intended, we grabbed some pillows, made some forts, and started an all out checker throwing war on each other.

It was all fun and games, till my dad came home- and he was greeted with a horrific surprise…

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Happy Turkey Day My Friends!

November 24th, 2010

I wanted to post and wish you all a very Happy Thanksgiving. May you enjoy your dressing, turkey, yams and cranberry sauce. Enjoy the pumpkin pie and whip cream. Enjoy your black friday shopping at Walmart, Target or wherever else your insanity will take you.

Regardless of how I behaved as a kid, I realize how important a family is now that I have one of my own. So from one bad kid to many others, Happy Thanksgiving!

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So, the date and time were set. I was going to step up and kiss my friend’s girlfriend because he wouldn’t do it. She was blonde, I was a boy….it made sense.

So, as the last school bell rang, I met up with Sally and we meandered down the hill, towards the pre-determined spot for the kiss.
We were both a bit nervous, but we came to that park with one thing in mind and we weren’t going to back out… no way, not now. There was an awkward silence as we stood close to each other, waiting for the other to do something or make some sort of “move”. We were 11, what did we know about “moves”?
We decided on the countdown technique of counting from 3, 2, 1 and then leaning in for the quick peck. It worked! Then there was some further awkwardness, embarrassment as we bid each other farewell and headed off in our own separate directions for home. I could barely contain my excitement. I was self-branded as a stud that day.
And I just remembered that to get that kiss, she passed me a note in class for me to circle “yes” or “no” on if I would kiss her. That was a crucial detail I left out. So, did I feel bad? Yeah, for a minute. But hey, they kept “going together” and I took over and “performed” where he could not….where he would not. I feel I only brought them closer together.
I believe she actually ended up being gay later in life, and really finding true love. So, that’s awesome for her. I just hope I wasn’t the one that showed her it was lackluster here on the guy side.

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My Best Friend’s Girlfriend

November 13th, 2010

I remember this well. I was in 5th grade, and while he wasn’t my “best” friend, he had a pool and it makes the title more catchy. Up to this point, my attempts at posting funny stuff or funny pictures have all been parents or family related. Well, my hormones kicked in early, so I upped the ante to include the bad stuff I did to my friends.

For this story, I will call her “Sally”. I believe all girls told in stories should be named Sally, because that name makes me laugh. Anyway, Sally was “going with” a friend of mine.. we’ll call him Billy. Again, easy name and funny to me for some reason. So, Sally wanted Billy to kiss her after school, but for whatever reason, Billy wasn’t down with that. I guess his hormones weren’t as raring to go as mine were apparently. So Sally and I had a conversation at recess one day about how Billy didn’t want to kiss her, yet they were “going together”. I still don’t understand that phrase “going together”. We were like 11 years old– we couldn’t really GO anywhere. But I digress….

Anyway, I calmed Sally down with my pre pubescent charm and one thing lead to another, and she was asking if I could kiss her after school instead. Now, I was good friends with Billy, but come on! When a cute girl ASKS you to kiss her, it was a little sad and incredibly flattering (considering I was in my prime bad hair mullet stage as seen by the mullet pictures below), so I was going to take what I was offered.

I gave Sally a tentative “Yes” and we planned to meet down the hill from school later that day, by the park……Good thing I had some Bubbilicious to freshen up for that kiss on that day…..

Stay tuned! :)

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More Bad Hair – The Bowl Cut

November 10th, 2010

Now, this wasn’t the 80s, but still, it was bad. I mean looking back on it, I’m not sure why I picked the bowl cut other than I thought it was kind of popular.

The latest fashion

The Latest Fashion


Maybe not popular, but definitely the latest fashion. This was when I went to a high school dance and I had to look good. I thought by getting a “#1″ guard on the clippers for the lower half was a good idea. Now, I have this in my pile of funny pics as a child. I don’t think I dated that girl for very long. She was younger than I was, so it must have been because I was so mature. Or, she sensed that I was on a dark road to a fashion disaster and broke it off quickly. Either way, I continue to blame my bad hair for my turn as a bad kid. Dont’ worry, there’s plenty more of these to come.

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